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982 – Home Shopping


Victor: Turn off the TV and put down that phone. I know what you’re about to do.

Julia: I wasn’t going to do anything.

Victor: You’re watching the home shopping channel and you have the phone in your hand, which means you’re about to call them and order something. Admit it.

Julia: I just wanted to ask some questions about this amazing item that’s on-screen right now. It’s 30 percent off if I call within the next eight minutes. Look how nice it looks on the model. It’s a limited edition necklace. If I don’t call soon, they’ll be sold out!

Victor: That’s why I have to keep you from calling. You don’t need another piece of second-rate jewelry from the home shopping channel.

Julia: Oh, look what you’ve done! They’re sold out. But hey, look at that machine they’re demonstrating. It’s amazing what it can do.

Victor: You don’t need another ridiculous gadget that you buy after watching some rigged demonstration. You know that they never work the same way at home as they do on TV.

Julia: Some of them do. Remember that machine I bought for washing nuts? That worked well.

Victor: Yeah, and how much use did we get out of that? We have an entire garage full of steals you just couldn’t resist. That’s why I need to do something drastic.

Julia: What?

Victor: I’m confiscating that remote!

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